Our son went apartment looking today!!!!!

TrueTone911TrueTone911 Senior MemberPosts: 5,727 Senior Member
We love him to death and our relationship with him is something I would have given my right arm for when I was growing up.

But he's 25 and its time.

We are truly excited for...US! OK, for him to.
I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
Groucho Marx

Replies

  • samzheresamzhere Banned Posts: 10,923 Senior Member
    When our boys were late teens, early 20s, we would leave subtle hints about their needing to find a new place to live, like slip army recruiting brochures under their bedroom doors. We also tried moving to a new house while they were out but they kept tracking us down.

    So I decided to turn the tables, borrowed their cars and ran them dry, parked them but didn't say anything, ate their leftovers from takeout pizza or mex food they stowed in the fridge, etc.

    Eventually they got the hint.

    Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
  • MichakavMichakav Senior Member Posts: 2,022 Senior Member
    Good for him!


    When I turned 19, my dad said "time to go bud". It took me about a month to find a place and the rest is history. At the time, only living with him for 3 years after many years of longing to do so, I felt a bit ****. But, I am thankful now as it tought me responsibility early on.

    We have never been as close as I would have liked, but it is what it is.
  • RazorbackerRazorbacker Senior Member Posts: 4,646 Senior Member
    I moved out when I was 18. But moved back in a year or so later when my little brother was killed in a car wreck. My mom was an inconsolable basket case. As soon as I felt like she was squared away I was gone again. Never to return.
    Teach your children to love guns, they'll never be able to afford drugs
  • agewonagewon Senior Member Posts: 655 Senior Member
    When I returned from MN at 21, the folks gave me a year to settle in, then get out! I moved in with my girlfriend (now wife) and after my father passed, I had a rough year with the girlfriend. I asked mom if she'd like company for a bit until I found a place and she said "no, I'm ok". Having no other options, she let me stay a month, but made it a miserable one. She said she loved me but didn't want me to get comfortable. AND she converted my old room into an office.
    Make sure you repurpose his room into something that won't make room for him. That way If he needs to come back, he'll get tired of the couch really quick and be on his way again.
  • horselipshorselips Senior Member Posts: 3,491 Senior Member
    My son left our home in Tucson and went off to college in Las Vegas when he turned 18, on a scholarship to UNLV. To be a teenager in Vegas with daddy's credit card - it doesn't really get better than that (how fast can you say "fake I.D."), and after earning his M.A., he and his wife have lived happily and insanely prosperously ever since. My daughter moved in with her high school BestFriendForever at 19 after getting her Dental Assistant certificate from Pima College, but she had a lot more ambition, so she moved back in for an extremely intensive (students can't work) 2 year course to be certified as an X-Ray technician. Moved out again at 22 and has since been trained and nationally board certified as a CT, MRI, and ultra-sound technician. Living large and loving it.

    Some kids take longer than others to get their lives together, but "failure to launch" is much more a European phenomenon than an American one.
  • gatorgator Senior Member Posts: 1,679 Senior Member
    My son lived with me until he was 24 but always had a job and pulled his own weight so no complaints.
    USMC 80-84
    -96 lbs
  • bisleybisley Senior Member Posts: 9,785 Senior Member
    My two daughters found their 'mates for life' at 22 and 18, and except for an occasional minor helping hand for a few years, have built their own lives as near as they could manage to the way they grew up. They still struggle, financially, occasionally, because between the two of them, they have seven kids that came early and often. But their husbands are solid wage-earners and they are family oriented, so they just 'suck it up' when times are rough, and make do with less, whenever necessary. I know how lucky I am to have both of them behaving responsibly.

    My wife and I never managed to save much when they were growing up, but they 'made it,' out there in the world, and did it quickly enough that we were able to pack our 401K's heavily throughout the intervening decade (plus) since they've been out of the house. I am now able to plan for my retirement to happen at age 62 (end of this year), and my wife can retire whenever she wants to, so life is good, if our health stays good.
  • DanChamberlainDanChamberlain Senior Member Posts: 2,961 Senior Member
    If they're in school and burning the midnight oil, they have a place to stay. If they are actively looking for a job in tough times, they have a place to stay. When they come home for the weekend, they have a place to stay. If crisis happens on the job like it did for my 2nd, she had a place to stay. Other than that, they have a place to stay...and I expect them to be there!
    It's a source of great pride for me, that when my name is googled, one finds book titles and not mug shots. Daniel C. Chamberlain
  • coolgunguycoolgunguy Senior Member Posts: 5,687 Senior Member
    It was just before my senior year of high school when I turned 18. That morning, my Dad (Mom and Dad divorced years earlier) handed me my birthday card...which was a rent bill. I worked all through high school, but always treated 'my' money as mine and mine alone. Years later, I realized Dad tried to teach by example, but I was pretty selfish and thick headed so the lesson never caught. I didn't move out for another ~ three years (I remember the day, but not the date) but I paid rent all the while.

    My oldest, OTOH, cannot wait to get out of the house. She just turned 16 and would love to be out on her own. I think she could probably do it too, but we're going to make her finish high school first, Lol!
    "Bipartisan" usually means that a bigger than normal deception is happening.
    George Carlin

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