Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 41

Thread: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

  1. #1
    Senior Member Jeff in TX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    J&D Ranch - North Central TX
    Posts
    1,061

    I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Since the new ranch house isn't done we're still living in the small 900 sq foot house on the ranch. My wife planned for a ladies weekend months ago thinking the new house would be done...WRONG! This past weekend we had nine of her co-workers out and no place for me to escape! I thought about my tent but it was in storage a long with most everything I own. Friday night the screaming dance music on the front porch didn't shut off until after 2 am. Did I ever tell y'all just how much I hate dance music. Then they came in to get ready for bed beyond three sheets to the wind! They were almost as loud as the dance music. Saturday I played tour and fishing guide and we even went out for a night time hog hunt. Not that we were going to shoot anything with all the hen cackling going on as we walked. Saturday night was a repeat of Friday night. Up dancing until 2 am. I tried to escape to church on Sunday morning but found myself being the "Camp Crazy Ladies" cook.

    A few packed up and headed home...but not all of them. I was really hoping for a relaxing afternoon to lay around and do nothing. Nope, the remaining bunch wanted to 4-wheel around the ranch and hunt deer in the evening. I did make them all go get hunting licenses. Now I had half crazy women who some shot a rifle for the first time that afternoon on the rifle range all headed out with high power rifles to deer hunt. I went an sat in my neighbors box blind with the video camera. Thank goodness no one shot at deer or anything else.

    They got back from hunting and all of the remaining women packed up and headed home. I made nacho's and sat down and watched TV. My wife was worn out and in bed at 8:30.

    I'm telling you folks it was touch and go there for a while! I did survive and I didn't slit my wrist!
    Last edited by Jeff in TX; 12-06-2017 at 12:14 AM.

  2. #2
    Moderator Wambli Ska's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Working on my tan!
    Posts
    23,293

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Dude, the chances of my wife putting me in a situation where I'm surrounded by 9 drunk partying chicks are on the negative side of ZERO!!! The whole party would have been swimming nekked in your "pond" by 10:00pm!

    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton

  3. #3

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    You have a truck. You have a place to sleep
    To make something simple is a thousand times more difficult than to make something complex.
    -Mikhail Kalashnikov

  4. #4
    Senior Member cpj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    MOzambique
    Posts
    35,023

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    I'm smart enough to know that the best place for me to be in that situation is as far away as I can possibly be.
    Quote Originally Posted by Zee View Post

    I'm here for the guns, hunting, and skirt wearing men.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Jeff in TX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    J&D Ranch - North Central TX
    Posts
    1,061

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    I'm smart enough to know that the best place for me to be in that situation is as far away as I can possibly be.
    Yep lessons learned! I had totally forgotten about the ladies weekend until midway through the week when she told me we'd have a house full! No place to run or hide...darn it all!

  6. #6
    Senior Member NN's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    21,630

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    I'm too old, don't want to hear of it.
    Someone please play Jingle Bells

  7. #7
    Senior Member cpj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    MOzambique
    Posts
    35,023

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Jeff in TX View Post
    Yep lessons learned! I had totally forgotten about the ladies weekend until midway through the week when she told me we'd have a house full! No place to run or hide...darn it all!
    You've got a truck. You had options man!
    Quote Originally Posted by Zee View Post

    I'm here for the guns, hunting, and skirt wearing men.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Posts
    5,687

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    You've got a truck. You had options man!
    Seriously. Sleeping under a bridge would have been better.
    I am afraid we forget sometime that the basic and simple things brings us the most pleasure.
    Dad 5-31-13

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    Swampland, FLA
    Posts
    3,979

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    At the first warning of an impending disaster , i would have left for parts unknown , sorry honey i forget my cell phone.

    JAY
    THE DEFINITION OF GUN CONTROL IS HITTING THE TARGET WITH YOUR FIRST SHOT

  10. #10
    Senior Member Jay's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    New Mexico/Texas
    Posts
    2,630

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    You've got a truck. You had options man!
    That being the case, he actually enjoyed it. Just won’t admit it...

  11. #11
    Senior Member Jeff in TX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    J&D Ranch - North Central TX
    Posts
    1,061

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Jay View Post
    That being the case, he actually enjoyed it. Just won’t admit it...
    That's just plain hurtful and spreading lies! I almost got PTSD from this past weekend! Could take years to recover!

  12. #12
    Senior Member CHIRO1989's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Central MN
    Posts
    8,857

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Jeff in TX View Post
    That's just plain hurtful and spreading lies! I almost got PTSD from this past weekend! Could take years to recover!
    Sober guy + Partying Women + video recording device= Leverage for just about anything

    Snooze ya lose
    I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn away from their ways and live. Eze 33:11

  13. #13
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    634

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by CHIRO1989 View Post
    Sober guy + Partying Women + video recording device= Leverage for just about anything

    Snooze ya lose
    Also know as a Get Out of Jail Free Card.

    Seriously, Liquored up woman, high-powered rifles and partying till 2 in the morning............30 years ago this would've been a dream weekend.

  14. #14
    Senior Member Jeff in TX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    J&D Ranch - North Central TX
    Posts
    1,061

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Spk View Post
    Also know as a Get Out of Jail Free Card.

    Seriously, Liquored up woman, high-powered rifles and partying till 2 in the morning............30 years ago this would've been a dream weekend.
    As a side note, I told them all anyone who wanted to hunt that evening couldn't drink after 1 pm. After two nights of partying hard no one drank on Sunday. Mainly most had severe headaches!

  15. #15
    Senior Member orchidman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    A true 'Southerner'. NZ
    Posts
    7,073

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    I am glad you didnt suffer too much.

    In case the circumstances arise again, just let me know the date and I will fly over to 'cover your back' so to speak.

    9 women who like alcohol, dance music, guns and hunting...............all in the same place together must have been a real hardship. I am prepared to make the sacrifice brother.
    Still enjoying the trip of a lifetime and making the best of what I have.....

  16. #16
    Senior Member SIGgal's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Location
    very rural New Jersey
    Posts
    1,126

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Oh my God, sounds like so much fun! If you have an 8 foot bed that never has to be made, you are ahead of the game Jeff lol. I thought a houseful of drunk girls was every mans dream tho lol.
    "Marriage is a hunting permit that allows you only one dear at a time"

  17. #17

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by SIGgal View Post
    Oh my God, sounds like so much fun! If you have an 8 foot bed that never has to be made, you are ahead of the game Jeff lol. I thought a houseful of drunk girls was every mans dream tho lol.
    Only when you are single.
    To make something simple is a thousand times more difficult than to make something complex.
    -Mikhail Kalashnikov

  18. #18
    Senior Member cpj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    MOzambique
    Posts
    35,023

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by bullsi1911 View Post
    Only when you are single.
    Yep.
    The married man says "I wish these drunkass women would go home so I could get laid/eat a sammich/go to bed.
    Quote Originally Posted by Zee View Post

    I'm here for the guns, hunting, and skirt wearing men.

  19. #19
    Senior Member zorba's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Merrritt Island, FL
    Posts
    13,556

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by bullsi1911 View Post
    Only when you are single.
    Yep, pretty much. I've been subjected to "feral women" a few times as a Belly Dancer - I've taken refuge backstage or in the dressing room on more than one occasion. *shudder*
    -Zorba, "The Veiled Male"
    "Religion can't be allowed the coercive power of government,
    government can't be allowed the 'moral' justification of religion."

  20. #20
    Senior Member zorba's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Merrritt Island, FL
    Posts
    13,556

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    Yep.
    The married man says "I wish these drunkass women would go home so I could get laid/eat a sammich/go to bed.
    -Zorba, "The Veiled Male"
    "Religion can't be allowed the coercive power of government,
    government can't be allowed the 'moral' justification of religion."

  21. #21
    Senior Member orchidman's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    A true 'Southerner'. NZ
    Posts
    7,073

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    Yep.
    The married man says "I wish these drunkass women would go home so I could get laid/eat a sammich/go to bed.
    Except in some cases only 2 & 3 apply.............
    Still enjoying the trip of a lifetime and making the best of what I have.....

  22. #22
    Senior Member Jeff in TX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    J&D Ranch - North Central TX
    Posts
    1,061

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    Yep.
    The married man says "I wish these drunkass women would go home so I could get laid/eat a sammich/go to bed.
    Yep, Amen to that!

  23. #23
    Senior Member knitepoet's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    15,560

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by cpj View Post
    Yep.
    The married man says "I wish these drunkass women would go home so I could get laid/eat a sammich/go to bed.
    The old "3 steps to make a man happy"

    Put much more politely than the original "Feed us, us, or put us to bed"
    Quote Originally Posted by Seven habits of highly effective pirates
    Rule #37: There is no “overkill”. There is only “open fire” and “I need to reload”.

  24. #24
    Moderator Wambli Ska's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Working on my tan!
    Posts
    23,293

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by CHIRO1989 View Post
    Sober guy + Partying Women + video recording device= Leverage for just about anything

    Snooze ya lose
    This! The possibilities for embarrassment and entertainment are endless!
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton

  25. #25
    Senior Member Jeff in TX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    J&D Ranch - North Central TX
    Posts
    1,061

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wambli Ska View Post
    This! The possibilities for embarrassment and entertainment are endless!

  26. #26
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    634

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Jeff in TX View Post
    As a side note, I told them all anyone who wanted to hunt that evening couldn't drink after 1 pm. After two nights of partying hard no one drank on Sunday. Mainly most had severe headaches!
    Yep.............

    30 some odd years ago Sunday would have been an extra day to party.

    These days when someone mentions a party, I often ask what kind of food they'll be serving and I'm outta there by 9:30.

  27. #27
    Member Axe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Location
    Sparta New Jersey
    Posts
    309

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Only thing worse is when your daughter brings all her extremely good looking friends to the house, and then the boys start swarming the house like flies and the hood rat music comes out. I'd take my chances with the older ladies over the young ones any day.

  28. #28
    Moderator Wambli Ska's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Working on my tan!
    Posts
    23,293

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Axe View Post
    Only thing worse is when your daughter brings all her extremely good looking friends to the house, and then the boys start swarming the house like flies and the hood rat music comes out. I'd take my chances with the older ladies over the young ones any day.
    Hummmmm, you’ve been burned a few times, no?
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton

  29. #29

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Quote Originally Posted by Wambli Ska View Post
    Hummmmm, you’ve been burned a few times, no?
    For some reason, I thought of this:

    To make something simple is a thousand times more difficult than to make something complex.
    -Mikhail Kalashnikov

  30. #30
    Moderator Wambli Ska's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Working on my tan!
    Posts
    23,293

    Re: I survived without having to slit my wrists!

    Oh that ain’t fair... Miesha Tate!!!

    you have got to UFC female weigh-ins...
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •