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The Al-Gebra Movement
Another stolen joke! The Al-Gebra Movement.
A teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, the Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
‘”Al-Gebra is a problem for us,” the Attorney General said. “They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.” They use secret code names like ‘X’ and ‘Y’ and refer to themselves as “unknowns”, but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, ‘There are 3 sides to every triangle’.
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.” White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that the Nobel Prize for Physics will follow
A teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, the Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
‘”Al-Gebra is a problem for us,” the Attorney General said. “They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.” They use secret code names like ‘X’ and ‘Y’ and refer to themselves as “unknowns”, but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, ‘There are 3 sides to every triangle’.
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.” White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President. It is believed that the Nobel Prize for Physics will follow
Refusing to conform to the left wing mantra of political correctness by insisting on telling the truth does not make you a loud mouth.
Replies
Yes sir. I never thought I would see this kind of goverment in the USA.
Thanks for the laugh! :up:
That Al-Gebra bunch is some bad folks. But they're lightweights compared to the Cal-Culus sect. The sect is actually made up of two distinct sects; the Integral Cal-Culus sect, and the Differential Cal-Culus sect. They can usually be seen carrying calculators with graphing capabilities, and speak in hushed tones about a secret code called 'derivatives'. The FBI hasn't been able to gather much information on them as they speak in an unknown language known only to the Cal-Culus sect. The FBI has tracked at least several million of this sect over several decades and is no nearer any real understanding of them. The FBI lists all members of the Cal-Culus sect as possible enemies of the state.
― Douglas Adams