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Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
How can we "help" Teach get better?
We all know and love Teach (Jerry) and wish him a good and quick recovery, and of course wish Miss Mary and all the family best spirits and energy to help, that's evident as in the other thread, how much we really care. An extended family, as has been said so eloquently.
With Teach out of danger however, I thought how we can "help" his recovery by suggesting humorous items about him, "helpful suggestions" that might give him a smile. Okay?
So...
As I said in the other thread, it looks as if Teach will be getting some stainless implants. I've got 'em in my left shoulder and fake left knee, also stainless wire in my once-sawn in half sternum, and I can offer this:
The metal implants are secretly designed (by smart female physicians) to give off "warning pulses" to pretty nurses and other cute hospital staff. When a pretty girl gets near one of these implants, she gets a "run away" subconscious suggestion and simply steers away from the bedside. I know it works because only ugly nurses attended to me. Or maybe only gruff male attendants.
Despite these implants, however, the occasional pretty nurse will either ignore or not pick up the signals, and therefore hospitals have implemented a secondary "shield" system, secretly putting "watch out!" warning signals on the patient's chart or medical records.
I know this for a fact.
With Teach out of danger however, I thought how we can "help" his recovery by suggesting humorous items about him, "helpful suggestions" that might give him a smile. Okay?
So...
As I said in the other thread, it looks as if Teach will be getting some stainless implants. I've got 'em in my left shoulder and fake left knee, also stainless wire in my once-sawn in half sternum, and I can offer this:
The metal implants are secretly designed (by smart female physicians) to give off "warning pulses" to pretty nurses and other cute hospital staff. When a pretty girl gets near one of these implants, she gets a "run away" subconscious suggestion and simply steers away from the bedside. I know it works because only ugly nurses attended to me. Or maybe only gruff male attendants.
Despite these implants, however, the occasional pretty nurse will either ignore or not pick up the signals, and therefore hospitals have implemented a secondary "shield" system, secretly putting "watch out!" warning signals on the patient's chart or medical records.
I know this for a fact.
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
Replies
I'm sort of thinking we could use this thread for some humorous "get well" silly stuff that Teach will enjoy reading a bit later, as he's recuperating. But of course serious messages are welcome, Teach being our pal.
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. - Groucho Marx