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40 yard shots, barns, dehorned bulls and Gaiman

JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior MemberPosts: 8,227 Senior Member
I'm not sure where this post should go, so I decided to put it here. Mods, it won't hurt my feelings if you move it.

I've been wanting to tell this story for some time, but have held back for fear of being ridiculed and derided. However, after Gaiman has so boldly made his appearance and showed me that real men can make ridiculous posts and take the heat, I've decided to share this.

Some time ago I decided I wanted to shoot a farmer's barn. I can't really say why I wanted to, other than it just seemed like a cool idea at the time. I didn't own a .223, but I did have a .222. Since there is only 1 number difference between the two, I figure the .222 must be almost as good as the .223. So, I chose to use my .222 for this venture.

I had very carefully and thoroughly scouted out the barn and the surrounding terrain. I also studied the weather patterns, and used my knowledge of both to plan a stalk. On the day of the 'hunt', I arose well before sun up, dressed in scent-lock clothing, and made my way to my drop off point. I spent most of the morning making the stalk, as I didn't want the barn to see or scent me and run off before I got into position for a shot. I've since learned that barns are somewhat immobile, and are much more prone to emit scent than to detect any. In other words, the careful stalk was a bit over the top. Also, at the time, I was totally unfamiliar with pit blinds, and didn't even consider using one. In retrospect, though, I doubt that it would have helped the situation.

Anyway, I finally got into position for a shot. I had spent a lot of time learning to judge distances, and knew I was within a few feet of 40 yards from the barn. Also, I had practiced shooting at distances to 50 yards, and figured if I was a bit off in my distance estimate I would be ok. I chose the prone position for the shot, as I had read that this was the steadiest of all the field shooting positions. I looked through my 16x scope and picked the exact spot I wanted to shoot. Then, I took a deep breath and let it out, took another breath and held it, and began my controlled trigger squeeze. As the trigger broke, and I heard the report of the rifle, I knew the shot was good. I immediately looked through the scope again and confirmed that I had indeed hit the barn. I am proud to say that I hit the broad side of a barn!

Unfortunately, no doubt much to Zee's disappointment, I was unable to perform a post-mortem. I saw the owner of the barn approaching, and felt it best to vacate the premises as fast as I could. It was well known in the local community that he did not like folks shooting his barn. Also, I don't remember if the bullet I used was a HP or something else, so I can't really comment on that aspect..

Now, you may ask, what has this got to do with dehorned bulls. I'm glad you asked. It turns out that the owner of the barn also owned a bull. The bull was very aggressive, and quickly bred all of the farmer's cows. Unfortunately, he also broke through the neighboring fences, engaged the neighbor's bulls in combat, defeated them, and bred the neighbors' cows. To ameliorate this, the farmer decided to dehorn the bull in hopes it would make him less aggressive. Alas, it worked too well, and the bull became much too timid, even to the point it would run off and hide at the site of another bovine creature.

Now, for the rest of the story. Some time after my adventure, I heard that the bull was in the barn, and had been cornered by a mama barn cat. I don't know if she feared for her kittens, or was just in a bad mood. Regardless, she had this poor old bull scared to death. About the time she was ready to tear him a new one, a bullet came out of nowhere and creased her skull, leaving a bald strip on the top of her head. As soon as she recovered, she ran off, leaving the bull with the impression that she had left due to something he had done. Because of this, the bull regained his self-confidence, and once again began doing his bullish duties. He was also less aggressive, and quit bothering neighboring bulls. So, I guess this story has a happy ending.

And now, last but by no means least, I have to give a big thanks to Gaiman. He has inspired me to take the bull by the horns and share this, regardless of how it will be received. Gaiman, my man, not only are you my hero, you are my muse. Thank you very much.
Jerry

Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
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Replies

  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    cpj wrote: »
    Maybe retirement ain't so good for you amigo.

    I'm honing my writing skills. I've decided that when I grow up I want to be Sam.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • BuffcoBuffco Senior Member Posts: 6,244 Senior Member
    JerryBobCo wrote: »
    I've decided that when I grow up I want to be Sam.

    Please don't.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    Buffco wrote: »
    Please don't.

    Good point.

    After rethinking this, I've decided I need a better muse.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • Six-GunSix-Gun Senior Member Posts: 8,155 Senior Member
    You left out the part where you shot the bull with a hollowpoint bullet and discovered how well the expand in aggressive bulls.
    Accuracy: because white space between bullet holes drives me insane.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    Six-Gun wrote: »
    You left out the part where you shot the bull with a hollowpoint bullet and discovered how well the expand in aggressive bulls.

    You must have missed the part where I said I don't remember what bullet I used, or that I wasn't able to do a post mortem. However, you are quite correct in that I was definitely shooting the bull.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • Six-GunSix-Gun Senior Member Posts: 8,155 Senior Member
    JerryBobCo wrote: »
    You must have missed the part where I said I don't remember what bullet I used, or that I wasn't able to do a post mortem. However, you are quite correct in that I was definitely shooting the bull.

    I saw that, but I felt the need to be hyper-inclusive of the teachings from our resident savant, Gaiman.
    Accuracy: because white space between bullet holes drives me insane.
  • KENFU1911KENFU1911 Senior Member Posts: 1,052 Senior Member
    Folks.......we have our new Patrick F. McManus ..........that was good...........ken
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    Six-Gun wrote: »
    I saw that, but I felt the need to be huper-inclusive of the teachings from our resident savant, Gaiman.

    Good point. I just couldn't figure out how to work in a post mortem on a barn.

    Maybe I'll try again and use fewer long words so that CPJ will understand it. -:)
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • NNNN Senior Member Posts: 25,146 Senior Member
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    KENFU1911 wrote: »
    Folks.......we have our new Patrick F. McManus ..........that was good...........ken

    Thanks. I think. :tooth:
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    NN wrote: »
    Huh

    Next time I'll use fewer long words and shorter sentences. :wink:
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    Six-Gun wrote: »
    I saw that, but I felt the need to be huper-inclusive of the teachings from our resident savant, Gaiman.

    Speaking of "savant", isn't that a word that's usually used with "idiot"?
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • tennmiketennmike Senior Member Posts: 27,457 Senior Member
    Good story! :roll2:
      I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
    ― Douglas Adams
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    tennmike wrote: »
    Good story! :roll2:

    Thank you. Maybe we found a use for Gaiman after all. -:)
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • Six-GunSix-Gun Senior Member Posts: 8,155 Senior Member
    JerryBobCo wrote: »
    Speaking of "savant", isn't that a word that's usually used with "idiot"?

    Indeed.
    Accuracy: because white space between bullet holes drives me insane.
  • LinefinderLinefinder Moderator Posts: 7,762 Senior Member
    This tale actually had two happy endings.

    #1 - I didn't have to help haul off an 800 lb bull.

    #2 - I didn't have to tell the PO'ed farmers wife that her favorite cat was ran over by a fast moving object.

    Jerry....though I wasn't there......it was a great day.

    Mike
    "Walking away seems to be a lost art form."
    N454casull
  • jaywaptijaywapti Senior Member Posts: 5,037 Senior Member
    Jerry, that has to be the greatest story ever told, I am in awe of you.

    JAY
    THE DEFINITION OF GUN CONTROL IS HITTING THE TARGET WITH YOUR FIRST SHOT
  • BuffcoBuffco Senior Member Posts: 6,244 Senior Member
    So what's the real life story behind this?
  • SlanteyedshootistSlanteyedshootist Senior Member Posts: 3,947 Senior Member
    More! More! Bravo!
    The answer to 1984 is 1776
  • Six-GunSix-Gun Senior Member Posts: 8,155 Senior Member
    Linefinder wrote: »
    This tale actually had two happy endings.

    #1 - I didn't have to help haul off an 800 lb bull.

    #2 - I didn't have to tell the PO'ed farmers wife that her favorite cat was ran over by a fast moving object.

    Jerry....though I wasn't there......it was a great day.

    Mike
    Don't forget #3: no poo was flung from the bowels of a bucket.
    Accuracy: because white space between bullet holes drives me insane.
  • LinefinderLinefinder Moderator Posts: 7,762 Senior Member
    Six-Gun wrote: »
    Don't forget #3: no poo was flung from the bowels of a bucket.

    Well, yes....there is that. But, against the first two, it pales.......;)

    Mike
    "Walking away seems to be a lost art form."
    N454casull
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    Linefinder wrote: »
    This tale actually had two happy endings.

    #1 - I didn't have to help haul off an 800 lb bull.

    #2 - I didn't have to tell the PO'ed farmers wife that her favorite cat was ran over by a fast moving object.

    Jerry....though I wasn't there......it was a great day.

    Mike

    But Mike, you missed the greatest shot I've ever made. Well, actually the greatest shot I've ever made at someone's barn.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    jaywapti wrote: »
    Jerry, that has to be the greatest story ever told, I am in awe of you.

    JAY

    Thank you, Jay. But, I have to give credit where credit's due. If it weren't for Gaiman's exploits, this story could never have been told.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    Buffco wrote: »
    So what's the real life story behind this?

    Surely you jest. Haven't you been following Gaiman's posts?

    And I promise I won't call you Shirley after this.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    More! More! Bravo!

    Thank you.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    cpj wrote: »
    I've got most of it, (still googling ) but I guess I'm confused as to why you consider gayman a mouse?

    You say mouse, I say muse. To quote Hillary, "WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?"
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • bisleybisley Senior Member Posts: 10,813 Senior Member
    You are an example to all of us who remain untested. I'm finally able to admit that I have referred to others, many times, as not being able to 'hit the broad side of a barn,' without ever having proved that I could do it, myself.

    For your next exploit, may I suggest trying to hit a bull in the butt with a bass fiddle?
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 8,227 Senior Member
    bisley wrote: »
    You are an example to all of us who remain untested. I'm finally able to admit that I have referred to others, many times, as not being able to 'hit the broad side of a barn,' without ever having proved that I could do it, myself.

    For your next exploit, may I suggest trying to hit a bull in the butt with a bass fiddle?

    Hmmmm. That assumes I know the difference. I'll have to study up first.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • jaywaptijaywapti Senior Member Posts: 5,037 Senior Member
    I have always considered myself to be an excellent marksman, but in my wildest dreams I would never have attempted a shot like that.

    JAY
    THE DEFINITION OF GUN CONTROL IS HITTING THE TARGET WITH YOUR FIRST SHOT
  • snake284snake284 Senior Member Posts: 22,429 Senior Member
    JerryBobCo wrote: »

    I've been wanting to tell this story for some time, but have held back for fear of being ridiculed and derided. However, after Gaiman has so boldly made his appearance and showed me that real men can make ridiculous posts and take the heat, I've decided to share this.

    WAIT!!! HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!!!

    Who ever said Gaiman was a "REAL MAN?"

    :rotflmao::rotflmao::rotflmao:
    Daddy, what's an enabler?
    Son that's somebody with nothing to do with his time but keep me in trouble with mom.
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