One last update on wife...

Wambli SkaWambli Ska ModeratorPosts: 27,837 Senior Member
The last 3.5 years have been probably the toughest of our lives in just about every sense you can come up with.  I feel compelled to write a last update on Kim since most of you folks were kind enough to set the prayer machine in motion and I'm firmly convinced that it was a HUGE factor in the outcome of things, and I've been approached by a few of my closer friends here asking how she is doing because I have not done an update in a long time.  So here it goes...

Kim had her 3 year anniversary in February this year and she is cancer free as far as all tests show.  3 years is a HUGE date for her particular type of cancer because it is a VERY aggressive type that often metastasizes to really bad places in short order.  Her percentages drop substantially (a good thing) at 3 years and then go down to just about normal at 5 years.  She is now down to semi-annual checkups with her team of oncologists and soon this ordeal will be down to just an annual visit with her oncologist and a standard physical.

I remember like it was yesterday when her oncology team leader, very seriously, told her the next few years of her life were going to SUCK but if she did her part and let him do his he would get her through to the other side.  He was NOT kidding and he is our hero.  My wife was instrumental in getting him a prestigious award in his institution and he earned every bit of this honor.  I know doctors are not supposed to get emotionally attached, but this doctor hugs and kisses my wife every time we meet and he has laughed with us and I have seen his eyes go misty during a particular tough time during treatments when we had to make some very serious decisions.

She underwent 3 major surgeries, innumerable needles and IVs, 8 weeks of radiation, 3 rounds of 5 different HIGHLY TOXIC chemo drugs (including a round of chemo not normally associated with her type of cancer but her doctor did it because it showed EXCELLENT prophylactic results stopping recurrence in a huge study in Japan), one clinical trial of an advanced technology using personalized immune system training to home in on YOUR OWN cancer and DNA, and some REALLY high tech stuff like a whole new way of doing deep tissue injections that go all the way down to the bone (apparently hurts like a bitch!).  This poor girl suffered innumerable physical side effects, pain and discomfort to a much higher level that I would ever think I could handle myself, and she is my personal hero because through all this I never heard one complaint out of her mouth.

In the mean time I was treated like hell by my old employer because while everyone was very supportive on the surface and to my face, I had a peer that found a way to take advantage of the situation and displace me from my position so I lost my job and was out of work for most of last year.  All of this while I'm paying deductibles, driving 7 hours round trips to get her to Duke Cancer center for treatments, buying airline tickets and rental cars when traveling with her to trials and basically living in hotels for weeks (during radiation 2 MONTHS!) so she can get the absolute best care we could get for her.

To add to this we are also dealing with her father's issues which of course are becoming more intense as time goes by and during Christmas this year we almost lost him.  And of course a myriad of other stresses that come from that situation alone...

The huge positive is that during this time of personal hell you truly find out who your real friends are.  They are the ones that maintain their kindness to you even when you are acting out, maybe even a little irrational and in a bad mood, because they have empathy for what you are going through and patience and love to spare, given to them as a gift by our Lord.  They are the ones that take the time to keep going and supporting you past the obligatory single call or email to wish you well or ask how you are doing when they first hear the news.  They are the ones that still invite you out for dinner even though it takes your wife a LOT longer to make herself feel pretty for a date when she has no hair and is all swollen from chemo, and that makes us very late.  They are the ones that don't turn their back on you because they think somehow you are "acting different" but are too self absolved to ask why, so it's easier for them to write you off than to try to lend a hand, be supportive or take a few minutes to understand what is going on with your life.  And of course you also find out who the crazy ones are that shave their head in solidarity and support of your wife just to put a smile on her face.  And THOSE you never forget.  The rest are a good deletion from your book of life.  The "acquaintances" column grew quite a bit in the last 3 years, most of them did it on their own and I thank them for saving me the pain of making those decisions, I had enough on my plate.

So on to today.  Kim is now scheduled for the last two surgeries.  I know this sounds bad but it is not!  They are reconstructive surgeries and that signals that her doctors feel she is cured and in good enough physical shape to endure this last stretch.  We found the best specialists in the field and we will be traveling to the clinic twice this summer to get this all done and sometime after October we are FINISHED with this chapter of our life.  I got a great new job a few months ago and I'm really enjoying making life miserable for my past employer by taking away their business.  And my FIL made a pretty miraculous recovery in the last few months (again your prayers!) and while his mental condition will never improve way he is still in good physical shape and a constant source of joy and entertainment in my life so I would have it no other way.

So a HUGE thank you for all our friends that still called, prayed, asked and took the time to support us through this horrid time.  Even a two minute chat, or a PM, a text message or a quick "How are things going?" was hugely appreciated, always special and a very welcome treat that kept us in the fight.  THANK YOU!!!  And know that we pay those back with our prayers for you...




"Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
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Replies

  • tennmiketennmike Senior Member Posts: 23,956 Senior Member
    Glad to hear she kicked the Big C's butt! Hope it's all behind her now, and nothing but smooth sailing from here on.
    I may be a Deplorable, but at least I'm not a Liberal!!!



  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    tennmike said:
    Glad to hear she kicked the Big C's butt! Hope it's all behind her now, and nothing but smooth sailing from here on.
    Thank you sir.  It's certainly looking that way.
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Big ChiefBig Chief Senior Member Posts: 32,532 Senior Member
    Great news Wambli!


    It's only true if it's on this forum where opinions are facts and facts are opinions
    Words of wisdom from Big Chief: Flush twice, it's a long way to the Mess Hall
    I'd rather have my sister work in a whorehouse than own another Taurus!
  • Big ChiefBig Chief Senior Member Posts: 32,532 Senior Member
    I'm pulling for y'all and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
    It's only true if it's on this forum where opinions are facts and facts are opinions
    Words of wisdom from Big Chief: Flush twice, it's a long way to the Mess Hall
    I'd rather have my sister work in a whorehouse than own another Taurus!
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    Big Chief said:
    Great news Wambli!
    Big Chief said:
    I'm pulling for y'all and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
    Thanks! Hey, you have a PM!
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • earlyagainearlyagain Posts: 2,295 Senior Member
    That's great she's had such a good doctor. My best wishes for both of you. Maybe the best summer ever coming your way.

    I just got off the phone with my mother who's in the hospital again. Been like a second address for her the last few years. So I can empathize with some of your trials.
  • Make_My_DayMake_My_Day Senior Member Posts: 6,745 Senior Member
    I'm happy to hear the worst is over for you and her.
    I HAVE HATED COMMUNISTS EVEN BEFORE THEY CHANGED
    THEIR NAME TO LIBERALS AND PROGRESSIVES
  • NNNN Senior Member Posts: 23,418 Senior Member
    o:)  just prayed 
    This message has been deleted
  • AntonioAntonio Senior Member Posts: 2,273 Senior Member
    Enzo, those are GREAT news; both the wife and I are VERY happy for how the things are developing for you guys despite everything. Give Kim our best wishes in her incoming procedures and hope everything goes OK.
    Thanks for the updates since good news like these are always welcomed.
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    That's great she's had such a good doctor. My best wishes for both of you. Maybe the best summer ever coming your way.

    I just got off the phone with my mother who's in the hospital again. Been like a second address for her the last few years. So I can empathize with some of your trials.
    So sorry buddy, just prayed for her.
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    I'm happy to hear the worst is over for you and her.
    Thanks.  For a while that light at the end of the tunnel was just a pinprick.
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    NN said:
    o:)  just prayed 
    Thanks you!  This is the type of support the kept us going.
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • knitepoetknitepoet Senior Member Posts: 18,057 Senior Member
    Thanks for the update. Give Kimmie a big ol' "Paulie" hug please sir
    Seven Habits of Highly Effective Pirates, Rule #37: There is no “overkill”. There is only “open fire” and “I need to reload”.


  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    knitepoet said:
    Thanks for the update. Give Kimmie a big ol' "Paulie" hug please sir
    She loves those  ;)
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    Antonio said:
    Enzo, those are GREAT news; both the wife and I are VERY happy for how the things are developing for you guys despite everything. Give Kim our best wishes in her incoming procedures and hope everything goes OK.
    Thanks for the updates since good news like these are always welcomed.
    Thanks my friend.  Hey maybe someday we can convince you to vacation a little farther north up the coast?  The east coast of the USA does not stop at Ft. Lauderdale you know  B)
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • JayhawkerJayhawker Moderator Posts: 14,301 Senior Member
    Thank you for the update....Life can certainly be a mess, but I guess there is some truth to "That which does not kill us makes us stronger". Glad things are looking up for you both...you certainly deserve it...
    Sharps Model 1874 - "The rifle that made the west safe for Winchester"
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    Jayhawker said:
    Thank you for the update....Life can certainly be a mess, but I guess there is some truth to "That which does not kill us makes us stronger". Glad things are looking up for you both...you certainly deserve it...
    Thank you sir, and there is a WHOLE lot of truth to your words.  I have seen changes in my wife that are astounding, and I can tell you we pay attention to sunrises and sunsets a whole lot more nowadays...
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • zorbazorba Senior Member Posts: 17,657 Senior Member
    Very, very cool. I'm so very happy to hear this - and prayer DOES work!
    -Zorba, "The Veiled Male"

    "If you get it and didn't work for it, someone else worked for it and didn't get it..."
  • RugerFanRugerFan Senior Member Posts: 1,619 Senior Member
    That is good news.  My mother survived breast cancer 10-15 yrs ago and is still going strong!! She cooked a birthday supper for me last week!!
  • Old RonOld Ron Senior Member Posts: 3,009 Senior Member
    Best wishes there SKA to you & your wife !
    Good news is always nice to hear !

  • ZeeZee Senior Member Posts: 19,989 Senior Member
    Glad she is kicking ass. 
    "To Hell with efficiency, it's performance we want!" - Elmer Keith
  • Gene LGene L Senior Member Posts: 9,744 Senior Member
    Great news!  God bless!
    Not too many problems you can't fix
    With a 1911 and a 30-06
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    zorba said:
    Very, very cool. I'm so very happy to hear this - and prayer DOES work!
    We believe so. Thanks!
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    RugerFan said:
    That is good news.  My mother survived breast cancer 10-15 yrs ago and is still going strong!! She cooked a birthday supper for me last week!!
    That is AWESOME!!!  One of my best friend's (who's been there every step of the way even though we didn't meet till only a few years ago) mother is 96 and has beat cancer 3 times.  I've spoken about her here.  She worked directly for Sir Winston Churchill during the darkest days of WWII and she is just a dynamo.  She became a great friend and inspiration to Kim (interestingly enough her name is also Kim) and was on the phone with her quite a bit when things got tough.   I think she was instrumental on getting my wife through it.  Survivors are just so comforting to talk to because they know...
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    Old Ron said:
    Best wishes there SKA to you & your wife !
    Good news is always nice to hear !

    Thank you sir.
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    Zee said:
    Glad she is kicking ass. 
    Harder than ever...
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member

    Gene L said:
    Great news!  God bless!
    Thanks Gene.  God bless you too.
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • Big Al1Big Al1 Senior Member Posts: 6,841 Senior Member
    Great news for both of you, very glad to hear it. Looking forward to seeing you both again at Jerry's, you both deserve a BIG Al hug!!
  • Wambli SkaWambli Ska Moderator Posts: 27,837 Senior Member
    Big Al1 said:
    Great news for both of you, very glad to hear it. Looking forward to seeing you both again at Jerry's, you both deserve a BIG Al hug!!
    Thanks buddy and we will take that hug.  You have PM...
    "Attack rapidly, ruthlessly, viciously, without rest, however tired and hungry you may be, the enemy will be more tired, more hungry. Keep punching." General George S. Patton
  • JermanatorJermanator Senior Member Posts: 14,345 Senior Member
    She kicked cancer's ass and not the other way around? I met her. I never questioned that outcome.
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