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Harder then I thougt

pjames777pjames777 Senior MemberPosts: 1,421 Senior Member
Daughter and SIL came by today to get the safe and most of my firearms, ammo, supplies, accessories and reloading.  Preparing for the last walk down the trail and thought I had it well planned and acknowledged.

Hard to see a chunk of your life being packed up and shipped out.  So many memories and what naught that as they drove off I thought of Peggy Lee's  "Is that all there is?"  Sorry guys. 

Bright side is, the kids and grandkids are committed to keeping it all in the family and having an annual shoot!  

Well, I'm still vertical and have a few more opportunities to make a difference.  Thanks for listening.

Patrck

Replies

  • LinefinderLinefinder Moderator Posts: 7,047 Senior Member
    Praying for you with all my heart.

    And, yes.....whether you realize it or not.........you've made a difference.

    This hit me pretty hard, dude.

    Mike
    "Walking away seems to be a lost art form."
    N454casull
  • sakodudesakodude Senior Member Posts: 3,893 Senior Member
    Prayers that you have quality time and more of it than you expect.
    The simple fact that you have family that will care for and honor your things means you've done it right. Be proud of that!
    It was a very tough time when my dad hit that moment in life. I was with him when he fired his last shot.
    It killed me to do so but I had to take his gun away from him, he just didn't have the strength to be safe anymore. He was mad as hell for a bit but deep down knew I was right to do so.
    Not long after that day he sat down with me and gave me instructions on how his treasures should be handled. I will admit I teared up just a little that day.
     
  • ilove22silove22s Senior Member Posts: 1,393 Senior Member
    edited August 8 #4
    fwiw,

    lifes a learning experience.

    heres what opened my eyes, if i posted this before, sorry but i think that people dont think/talk about things like this...

     > when i was young, as in grade school, i didnt think about death.  An aunt was in a auto accident, but i was not allowed in her room.  So it was just having to go to a hospital and wait.

     > when i was in highschool, a friends brother, took a shotgun went to our baseball field, sat under the bleachers and ate it.  It was sad, but i scratched my head, what was so bad in high school he had to do that.?

     > in college one of my best friends dad passed away from cancer.  A few years before that his sister died fo the same.   Another friends dad also died of cancer and 1 year later, his mom did too.

     > all of this got me thinking, about death and when we are younger, its not something thought of.  

     >but soon it came my time, where my mom passed away.  My dad is still alive, for now.

    > then it will come a time where me or my friends will pass on.  We are all about the same age so its just a matter of time.  My friend that got me into shooting and other things has diabetes. He also had 4 stints and just recently quad bypass.  So i see that eventually his time maybe up.   With this, it will eventually be my time or my bro/sis.   

    > i know that most dont think about it, but i have.  It may not be for everyone, but i see it as the circle of life.   

    > you still have time for things if you want.  Im selling off most of my toys since my nephews dont care for guns.  I will keep some, but not as much as i have.   I finally got my saddle on consignment too.  It was hard to part with that but i know i wont get back into it as much as i did before.  The worse case is that i just buy another one.  Im also downsizing all of my tack/riding clothes too.  Most of my horse/gun books have been sold/donated.  but i still have a good library.  Eventually those will all go.  

    > last comment. note its how i think.  many people think about the end, i look at whats between.  when i fell in love, i never thought i would.  But when she let me go, it hurt - alot.  Instead of moping all day or weeks/months, i looked at the fun/great times we had together.  The short time of the breakup was just a small fraction of time compare to the good times.  we still keep in touch and people are surprised i would keep in touch with an X.  but i didnt see any reason to burn any bridge between us.  I think im happier we do keep in touch too!. I will hopefully do the same when i die.  All of the awesome things i was able to do/try in my life i would have never thought so.  Traveling, seeing the space missions on TV, self driving cars, the internet, riding a horse on easter island and hyde park, seeing Normandy/Bastogne, Machu Picchu, ect and many many other things....  All of the things i have done and seen, i would have never believed it.  im sad that there is alot more out there, but i cant complain.  

    A thought.  If any of those toys you passed on has any special meaning or history, you may want to jot them down and pass on any special information/history.  Sometimes information gets lost/jumbled over time.

    Also, if you havent already maybe take the grandkids out for some shooting or?


    The ears never lie.

    - Don Burt
  • SpkSpk Senior Member Posts: 3,969 Senior Member
    pjames777 said:
    Daughter and SIL came by today to get the safe and most of my firearms, ammo, supplies, accessories and reloading.  Preparing for the last walk down the trail and thought I had it well planned and acknowledged.

    Hard to see a chunk of your life being packed up and shipped out.  So many memories and what naught that as they drove off I thought of Peggy Lee's  "Is that all there is?"  Sorry guys. 

    Bright side is, the kids and grandkids are committed to keeping it all in the family and having an annual shoot!  

    Well, I'm still vertical and have a few more opportunities to make a difference.  Thanks for listening.

    Patrck
    Make the most of the opportunities you have left.
    So many folks leave this world without a chance to make things right. They leave rather abruptly, unfortunately.
    I'm glad to hear your collection will continue to be appreciated.
    Keep us updated, we're here and we'll always listen.
    Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience -- Mark Twain
    How easy it is to make people believe a lie, and [how] hard it is to undo that work again! -- Mark Twain

  • earlyagainearlyagain Posts: 6,749 Senior Member
    That's not even close to all there is.

    The people that came over, and the one's who's images grace the walls and furniture in your home add up to a whole lot more.
  • GunNutGunNut Posts: 5,811 Senior Member
    Death has been a harsh reality for me for a long time.  My mom left us from Cancer when she was 35.  My father passed away rather unexpectedly as a very young and healthy 72 for just dumb reasons.  My 3 best friends on Earth all passed away young, two in their 30s and the last one that passed away at 60 on Christmas Eve just a few years ago.

    For what it's worth this harsh reality that you just went through is a blessing for yours.  I was too young when my mom passed to understand anything except her loss. and with my dad it was so sudden that there was no planing.  He was a few thousand miles away and in another country when he passed, living with a much younger girlfriend and her kids.  Anything of value he owned mysteriously disappeared, no one knew where it was or didn't remember him owning it.  That included the few firearms of his I wanted.  so I ended up with a few things he gave me over the years including a few watches etc but a lot of his things that meant much to him and me I'll never see again.

    I want to assure you that while painful, the time you just spent with yours will be a fond memory for them in time and you can move on with the satisfaction of having done what you needed to do for yourself and them.

    Prayers will keep going out for you brother.
    Old West Saying: God created men, but Col. Sam Colt made them equal.

    General George Patton:  “Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.”

  • zorbazorba Senior Member Posts: 23,667 Senior Member
    edited August 8 #8
    You're in my thoughts and prayers here as well. Agree with others: Tell the stories of those treasures you're passing on, your descendants will thank you and treasure both the item and the story. Why my father handed me his .303 Enfield, I just about "lost it" right there - in fact I think I have something in my eye right now just thinking about it.
    In my tradition, we sometimes say "Goddess Bless, and may She ease your passage through the veil." - Translate that to terms that work for you. I also know that this isn't the first time you've made this journey...
    ETA: 3 or 4 days before my dad passed, he expressed some regret that "...if I had known certain things, I would have done some things differently." I asked him if he had learned anything from such experiences - he replied "Yes". I then told him "Then that's all that matters, you LEARNED. Be at peace and have no regrets. Go dance on the other side of the veil with Ma - your time here is over."
    Now I know I have something in my eye...
    -Zorba, "The Veiled Male"

    "If you get it and didn't work for it, someone else worked for it and didn't get it..."
  • pjames777pjames777 Senior Member Posts: 1,421 Senior Member
    You are all too kind.  My heart is filled with your good wishes, thoughts, prayers and love for a fellow man.

    Patrick
  • JustsomedudeJustsomedude Posts: 544 Senior Member
    A subject often thought about by me. I've done alot of thinking and observing when it comes to death. I've noticed that its been made such a taboo subject in our culture that most dont/won't discuss it with their family and friends. Doing so makes it more difficult because we tend to put it in the back of our minds. Then I've come to realize that death is just part of living, we all take it there some day. Id almost imagine that death has to be easy since life is so difficult to maintain and likely starts the real "beginning". The only part of death that i fear is not getting to see, feel, and experience all that this earth and universe has to offer. Its always astonished me that this universe has existed for billions of years and here we are lucky to get 80. It makes me wonder why whomever or whatever put us here even bothered.
  • FreezerFreezer Senior Member Posts: 1,756 Senior Member
    My heart is heavy as I read this. I'm 63 yo and have experienced death in many forms. 6 times suicide has touched my life including my eldest son and best friend. I had a minor heart attack some years back and that got me thinking, I'm glad I decided a long time ago not to old on to anything too tight. My children and wife know what to do if I'm not here tomorrow and I've already parted with the things that held the family memories.

    I like the way your approaching this. My mother had dementia and it took its toll on dad. After her passing I flew in and helped dad for a few weeks. He lived next to my sister and she was a blessing to him. I set up his finances in both of their names and had her appointed with power of attorney/executer of his affairs. Dad was going into the fog bank of Alzheimer's and as he got closer we talked about it. He gave up his driver's license and narrowed his belonging so nothing of value was left to fight over. He stashed cash in envelopes to tip the priest, alter servers, choirs and throw a party. Eventually  he went to a nursing facility where he passed peacefully with his family around him. I was there when he entered the facility and had his doctor write a prescription for two cold beers every evening.  My sister made sure his medication was available. I was with him the last three days and spent the last night in his room. The next day my brother, sister and a couple family members were there when the priest and a grief counselor came in to comfort us. They ended up joining the calibration of his life. After he passed I went to the kitchen, got his beer and we all toasted a life well lived. 

    That evening as he drew his last breaths I was given the blessing of whispering the last Hail Mary into his ear as he passed. 

    Your family is a testament to a life well lived. You are very thoughtful and kind to be taking care of things now for your family. You are making their burden light and giving them a gift of a loving example.   

    May your heart be light and your passing be easy. 

    You will be in my prayers.
    God Bless you
    I like Elmer Keith; I married his daughter :wink:
  • Gene LGene L Senior Member Posts: 11,743 Senior Member
    Go easy.
    Concealed carry is for protection, open carry is for attention.
  • knitepoetknitepoet Senior Member Posts: 21,096 Senior Member
    Patrick, this hurts me to read.

    Enjoy the time you have and make fond memories with the family
    Seven Habits of Highly Effective Pirates, Rule #37: There is no “overkill”. There is only “open fire” and “I need to reload”.


  • pjames777pjames777 Senior Member Posts: 1,421 Senior Member
    Gene L said:
    Go easy.
    Will try but I'm thinking kicking and screaming!  LOL
  • GunNutGunNut Posts: 5,811 Senior Member
    pjames777 said:
    Gene L said:
    Go easy.
    Will try but I'm thinking kicking and screaming!  LOL
    Yeah that’d be me too 😂
    Old West Saying: God created men, but Col. Sam Colt made them equal.

    General George Patton:  “Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.”

  • RaftermanRafterman New Member Posts: 233 Member
    knitepoet said:
    Patrick, this hurts me to read.

    Enjoy the time you have and make fond memories with the family

    This! When I was working EMS I saw so many people take their last breath. Sure put my own mortality front and center in my face.
  • TugarTugar Senior Member Posts: 2,222 Senior Member
    We don't talk much but I applaud you for having some foresight on this. Too many wait too long and then it's just a huge struggle. My wife and I spent 5 months apart while she dealt with the house and assorted items PACKED into his house in another state. 

    It's something we will all have to deal with. You know they are going to a good home. Will be praying for you as well.
     
    Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery.
    Winston Churchill
  • JerryBobCoJerryBobCo Senior Member Posts: 7,952 Senior Member
    Patrick, I'm so sorry to read this.  I can't say I really know you, but you've been a good member of this forum for a long time, so I know you must be one of the good guys.  I've sent prayers your way, and asked God to ease the rest of the time you have.

    Without getting too religious, I hope you have made preparations for what comes next.  PM me if you need to talk.

    May God bless you and yours.
    Jerry

    Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.
  • pjames777pjames777 Senior Member Posts: 1,421 Senior Member
  • tennmiketennmike Senior Member Posts: 27,398 Senior Member
    Hang in there and make every day count. Do things you want to do that you are still able to do. Best wishes and prayers that you have some fun in whatever time you have left. Live every day to its full measure. 
      I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
    ― Douglas Adams
  • LinefinderLinefinder Moderator Posts: 7,047 Senior Member
    tennmike said:
    Hang in there and make every day count. Do things you want to do that you are still able to do. Best wishes and prayers that you have some fun in whatever time you have left. Live every day to its full measure. 
    And that, Mike, is how we should all live our lives every day, not just when the clock is counting down because you really never know when the clock starts ticking backwards.

     8:30 AM MDT tomorrow marks 2 years since my Vfib episode. An incident that is 100% fatal if not witnessed and proper immediate care rendered. An extremely fortunate chain of events allowed me to be one of the lucky survivors.

    1) I had just passed through a doorway. Had I dropped 2 steps earlier, I would't have been seen.

    2) A young engineer (who's normally chained to his desk at that time of day) was in the toolroom by pure chance, and looked my way when he heard the thud. He knew CPR and started immediately, while screaming for help. He never left my side.

    3) Our HR person got there within seconds with a portable defibrillator and knew how to use it. (I didn't know we even had any). And I can count the number of days she's gotten to work before 9AM in the past 5 years on the fingers of one hand.

    4) A CSFD Emergency Response Team was parked in a Safeway parking lot 2 blocks from where I was.

    In spite of all those lucky breaks God tossed my way that morning, I still have a hard time following your advice. But I'd sure like to.

    Mike


    "Walking away seems to be a lost art form."
    N454casull
  • pjames777pjames777 Senior Member Posts: 1,421 Senior Member
    Linefinder:   Random often isn't.  Enjoy your gift and the new opportunity.  Wish you much extended happiness and love in your life.

    Patrick
  • Elk creekElk creek Senior Member Posts: 6,462 Senior Member
    Sorry to hear this. I don’t have the words, just enjoy what you have.
    Aim higher, or get a bigger gun.
  • JustsomedudeJustsomedude Posts: 544 Senior Member
    Mike, after having your CA, did it leave you feeling "vulnerable " for a lack of a better word, afterwards? Sometimes being reminded of your mortality is a cold reality.
  • jaywaptijaywapti Senior Member Posts: 4,960 Senior Member
    . But the truth is, I didn't even know it happened until a week later. It was "lights out" like flipping a switch. No warning, no symptoms, no dizziness.....just "Bam".....gone.



    Patrick, Thank's for sharing, Your in my prayers.

    I'm selling off all my stuff as I have no one that wants it.

    Mike, mine was similar to yours, 11:00 PM I put a cup of coffee in the microwave, entered 2 min hit start and was laying on the floor, called 911, luckily i lived in a small town and  my friends Mark  an EMT and Randy local LEO were there in 3 minutes. Because of a blizzard the chopper couldnt land so Mark and the other EMTs took me 60 miles down I -70 to the hospital, I died twice on the ride and even though I had a DNR they brought me back and I woke up 5 days later. 

    I was 66 at the time and other than " walking " pneumonia in 1960 I was never sick a day in my life ( not counting broken bones gsw,etc) 

    That was Jan 11, 2006 , I will be 83 in Oct. and in all honesty I'm on the downhill slide, I am the oldest in my family and wish to be next as i'm tired of burying others.

    Sorry for rambling on but Patrick's post hit a soft spot.

    JAY


    THE DEFINITION OF GUN CONTROL IS HITTING THE TARGET WITH YOUR FIRST SHOT
  • LinefinderLinefinder Moderator Posts: 7,047 Senior Member
    Mike, after having your CA, did it leave you feeling "vulnerable " for a lack of a better word, afterwards? Sometimes being reminded of your mortality is a cold reality.
    No, not really. As I said, mine was instant blackout and it was 4 days later before I even knew something had happened, and had already been pronounced "OK". I didn't see flashing lights, long dead relatives, nor did I float above my own body. Complete blackness. Completely emotionless experience. It was over before I even knew it had happened.

    I have come to realize that it can all come to an abrupt end at any age, at any time, for any reason, and I'm truly ok with that.

    But, in my mind, what pjames is speaking of would terrify me. I don't know that I'd handle knowing my expiration date very well. In fact...I can't even imagine it.

    Mike
    "Walking away seems to be a lost art form."
    N454casull
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