My new favorite expression !

DoctorWhoDoctorWho Senior MemberPosts: 9,496 Senior Member
A customer told Me his father used to say:

"That man is a bit thin between the horns"......

I love it !!!!

That and "all hat and no cattle".....
"There is some evil in all of us, Doctor, even you, the Valeyard is an amalgamation of the darker sides of your nature, somewhere between your twelfth and final incarnation, and I may say, you do not improve with age. Founding member of the G&A forum since 1996

Replies

  • avmechavmech Senior Member Posts: 858 Senior Member
    I am kinda partial to this one: picking fly poop out of the pepper
    NRA Benefactor Member
  • Make_My_DayMake_My_Day Senior Member Posts: 7,148 Senior Member
    One of the funniest expressions I ever heard was from an Army pal in 1970...."tighter than a gnat's a$$ stretched over a rain barrel! :referring to how someone treats his money.
    JOE MCCARTHY WAS RIGHT:
    THE DEMOCRATS ARE THE NEW COMMUNISTS!
  • LMLarsenLMLarsen Senior Member Posts: 8,337 Senior Member
    I've always been fond of, "That boy's so dumb, he couldn't pour [pee] out of a boot if the directions were printed on the heel!"
    “A gun is a tool, no better or no worse than any other tool: an axe, a shovel or anything. A gun is as good or as bad as the man using it. Remember that.”

    NRA Endowment Member
  • tennmiketennmike Senior Member Posts: 26,106 Senior Member
    My all time favorite expression has always been, "Bless his/her/your heart!". As a prefix or suffix to any sentence it can convey several meanings. Context means everything in it's use. It's most common use is to convey the meaning that the person to whom it is directed is an idiot of some sort. It also convey sympathy. And sometimes both.
    For example, a Southerner and a person from New Jersey are introduced. In this instance, "Well bless your heart" conveys both.
    Person from New Jersey says, "I'm from New Joisey!"
    Person from the South says, "Well bless your heart!"
    :tooth::roll2::silly::jester:
    If the U.S. Congress was put in charge of the Sahara Desert, there would be a shortage of sand in under six months.



  • DoctorWhoDoctorWho Senior Member Posts: 9,496 Senior Member
    If ignorance were virtue, (insert a name here) would be a saint...........
    "There is some evil in all of us, Doctor, even you, the Valeyard is an amalgamation of the darker sides of your nature, somewhere between your twelfth and final incarnation, and I may say, you do not improve with age. Founding member of the G&A forum since 1996
  • JayhawkerJayhawker Moderator Posts: 15,072 Senior Member
    "Tighter 'n Dicks hatband"

    "Nothing ain't so broke that it can't be thrown away."
    Sharps Model 1874 - "The rifle that made the west safe for Winchester"
  • DoctorWhoDoctorWho Senior Member Posts: 9,496 Senior Member
    From My LE days: "We are starting a new program to eliminate all the dead wood from the department !!!!" this after a famous incident where 40 shots were fired with none hitting the intended target..........
    "There is some evil in all of us, Doctor, even you, the Valeyard is an amalgamation of the darker sides of your nature, somewhere between your twelfth and final incarnation, and I may say, you do not improve with age. Founding member of the G&A forum since 1996
  • bruchibruchi Senior Member Posts: 2,582 Senior Member
    "So hard a midget can do pull ups on it"
    If this post is non welcomed, I can always give you a recipe for making "tostones".
  • BigslugBigslug Senior Member Posts: 7,045 Senior Member
    "Couldn't scratch his butt with a handful of fish hooks" - Kenfu1911, circa 1997.
    WWJMBD?

    "Nothing is safe from stupid." - Zee
  • 1965Jeff1965Jeff Senior Member Posts: 1,611 Senior Member
    If brains were dynamite _____ couldn't blow his nose.
  • coolgunguycoolgunguy Senior Member Posts: 6,464 Senior Member
    "He's so full of (crap) that, if you gave him an enema, you could bury him in a matchbox!"

    "______ looks like forty miles of bad road."

    "He's so hung over, his eyes look like two 'pee' holes in a snow bank!"

    "As far as ______ is concerned, he's a pretty good _______" Fill in the two blanks with two very different occupations, like mechanic and chef.
    "Bipartisan" usually means that a bigger than normal deception is happening.
    George Carlin
  • Big ChiefBig Chief Senior Member Posts: 32,995 Senior Member
    'More confused than a blind lesbian in a fish market'

    'Little Tommy Tucker, his twin brother and every other mother blanker'
    It's only true if it's on this forum where opinions are facts and facts are opinions
    Words of wisdom from Big Chief: Flush twice, it's a long way to the Mess Hall
    I'd rather have my sister work in a whorehouse than own another Taurus!
  • 44special44special Member Posts: 64 Member
    More f*d up than a soup sandwich.

    Nuttier than a s*house rat.
  • FiveSevenFiveSeven Member Posts: 289 Member
    That'll gag a maggot.

    Don't let fear and common sense stop you.
    Only the optimists suggest that the future is uncertain. The pessimists have done the math.
  • Diver43Diver43 Senior Member Posts: 8,672 Senior Member
    That should go over like a fart in church.

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using Tapatalk 2
    Logistics cannot win a war, but its absence or inadequacy can cause defeat. FM100-5
  • Big ChiefBig Chief Senior Member Posts: 32,995 Senior Member
    Sweating like a slave on the auction block.
    It's only true if it's on this forum where opinions are facts and facts are opinions
    Words of wisdom from Big Chief: Flush twice, it's a long way to the Mess Hall
    I'd rather have my sister work in a whorehouse than own another Taurus!
  • 10 AC10 AC Member Posts: 309 Member
    If you took his brain and put it in a match box.
    It would roll around like a BB in a box car.
    Teach
    If you don't have a C&R FFL,you really need to consider getting one----it's a license to spend money, though.
  • gatorgator Senior Member Posts: 1,689 Senior Member
    Dumber than hammered s***
    USMC 80-84
    -96 lbs
  • FisheadgibFisheadgib Senior Member Posts: 5,697 Senior Member
    Of all the places that I've lived, Texas was by far the best place to pick up great sayings. Most of the old timers that I worked around had an endless supply of them. One of my favorites that I still don't hear often is "he's so tight, when he farts, only dogs can hear it."
    snake284 wrote: »
    For my point of view, cpj is a lot like me
    .
  • DoctorWhoDoctorWho Senior Member Posts: 9,496 Senior Member
    That is true, a Texan can keep you laughing for days........

    Edited to add: It is however bad if you are trying to drink your beer..... :spittingcoffee:
    "There is some evil in all of us, Doctor, even you, the Valeyard is an amalgamation of the darker sides of your nature, somewhere between your twelfth and final incarnation, and I may say, you do not improve with age. Founding member of the G&A forum since 1996
  • bhl2506bhl2506 Senior Member Posts: 1,847 Senior Member
    He's tighter than a boars @**.

    Busier than a three p%$##kered billy goat in a field full of sheep.

    ______ is ugly enough to stop a clock.

    ______ is ugly enough to make a train take a dirt road.
    Refusing to conform to the left wing mantra of political correctness by insisting on telling the truth does not make you a loud mouth.
  • Big ChiefBig Chief Senior Member Posts: 32,995 Senior Member
    Drier than a popcorn fart..........:popcorn::popcorn::popcorn:
    It's only true if it's on this forum where opinions are facts and facts are opinions
    Words of wisdom from Big Chief: Flush twice, it's a long way to the Mess Hall
    I'd rather have my sister work in a whorehouse than own another Taurus!
  • Big ChiefBig Chief Senior Member Posts: 32,995 Senior Member
    Here are a few geed ones from this site:
    http://www.havaris.ca/ok/funny-redneck-slangs-quotes-sayings/01.htm

    It tastes so bad ya gotta lick the cat’s butt to get the taste outta yer mouth.

    It was so quiet, you could hear a mouse pissin’ on a cotton ball.

    It’s hotter then two rats screwing in a wool sock.

    It’s so dry, the Baptist are sprinkling and the Methodist are using a damp washcloth.

    It's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepper patch.

    A bothersome person is "like a booger you cain't thump off."

    A few more beers, and I’d probably do ya. So give me a minute darling, and then I’ll give you one!

    Hey and one fer Breamfisher:

    Call him Bream,cause he’s got hands like a fish!
    It's only true if it's on this forum where opinions are facts and facts are opinions
    Words of wisdom from Big Chief: Flush twice, it's a long way to the Mess Hall
    I'd rather have my sister work in a whorehouse than own another Taurus!
  • ghostsniper1ghostsniper1 Banned Posts: 2,645 Senior Member
    Some from my oldman.

    1. The snow is arsehole deep to a 9 foot indian.
    2. That is tighter than a bulls arse.
    3. Colder than a welldiggers arse.
  • JayhawkerJayhawker Moderator Posts: 15,072 Senior Member
    "Hotter 'n a two dollar pistol" (Usually applied to a member of the female gender)
    Sharps Model 1874 - "The rifle that made the west safe for Winchester"
  • Chris CChris C Member Posts: 44 Member
    I love watching Lizzard Lick Towing for all the crazy a$$ expressions..... :rotflmao:

    "I know you're all roostered up, but I ain't feeling your cock-a-doodle-do.".

    "She's madder than a wet hen at an omelet scramble."
    "It's better to have one and not need it , than to need one and not have it"
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