Very unusual poker game
I was invited to play in a local poker game Saturday night. I didn't know the person who invited me very well, but thought it might be a good chance to connect with some like minded individuals, so I accepted.
Before I got there, I hit the ATM to make sure I had some cash, and followed his directions to his house. It was a very nice, big house that had immaculate landscaping. Right away, I felt a little out of place. I rang the doorbell, and was greeted by my host. He escorted me to his game room, which was unbelievable. It was a large room, with a huge flat screen TV, a pool table, a number of mounted game heads, and on and on. The poker table, I was told, was custom made from mahogany. I was impressed, and bit intimidated.
There were only 6 seats at the poker table, but a quick count showed that I was the eighth person there. Most of the men were about my age, and better dressed than I was. There were two, though, who were much younger and playing pool. I was told they would not be playing poker. They were also very big, muscular guys.
The host asked how many chips I wanted, and suggested $50 as a good starting point. So, I bought $50 worth of chips. The next to buy chips, who also had never played there before, bought $50 worth. Then 2 guys each bought $20 worth, and finally my host and his buddy didn't buy any.
I was told that the ante was $3, so I kicked in $3 worth of chips. So did the other buy who started with $50 worth of chips. The two who had bought $20 worth of chips only put in a dollar, and my host and his buddy didn't put in any ante. I asked about this, and told it was the rules. The two who purchased the most chips had to ante up $3, the two who bought $20 worth only 1, and the two who did not buy any chips at all played for free. I figured it was his game, so I would play by his rules.
After the first hand, I noticed a pattern. The two who didn't ante immediately folded. The two who anted $20 folded immediately or after a round of bidding. This meant that me and the other guy who bought $50 worth of chips were playing against each other. I had a good hand and won. Before I had a chance to drag in my winning, the two who did not ante and the two who only anted $1 started grabbing some of the pot. I cried foul, and was told that it was the rule. The rules allowed the two who did not ante and bought no chips to take 10% each of every pot. The next two were allowed 5% each of every pot.
After about an hour, and winning about half of every pot, I realized that I only had about $45 worth of chips. I decided that was enough and bowed out. It was then that I was told I had to pay the two pool players, or "attendants", 15% each of my winnings. When it was all said and done, I left with a little over $35 of my original $50, even though I had played well.
I told the host that his kind of poker was not for me, to which he replied "this is not just any kind of poker, you know. It's government poker."
Gun control laws make about as much sense as taking ex-lax to cure a cough.